Sunday, July 18, 2010

How to Act like You're Richer than Gates on an MC Hammer Budget - Part 1

First let's get this straight I do not advocate being a perma bitch or acting holier than Jesus. Being a S.N.O.B. (She is Never Openly Broke) is just having classy standards and never admitting you are ever less than fortunate.

Rule 1: Perception is 2/3 of the law.
  • People believe anything! So you already have the upper hand.
  • Never say: “I am so broke” or “ I can’t afford to do that” when your friends ask you to join them for dinner at a new expensive restaurant and you don’t feel like shelling out $100 for the most awesome piece of sushi ever. Seriously I like a good piece of sushi, but that fish better be spiked with eternal youth if that is what I am spending.
  • Say this instead: 
    • “I can’t make it tonight because I need my beauty sleep; I have a super busy weekend ahead." - Wow she is popular!
    • “I am so slammed at work, its going to be a late night at the office." - She is so productive,  and important! Such a dedicated worker surely commands a high salary.
    •  “I can’t make it tonight, I am saving for the new Louis bag”. That way if you do (and I don’t advise this) purchase a fake LV bag your friends will automatically believe it is real, obviously unless I am your friend.
While this might all sound just down right manipulative and shallow, it is not. If your goal in life is to live like the princess you know you are then strategy is everything. One must present themselves in the way they aspire to be- manifest destiny ladies!

"Sorry Goldilocks I can't make it tonight I am redecorating the house aka cleaning the floors of my ugly stepmother's shack” – Cinderella


  1. That is really funny. Everyone knows I'm broke, so there isn't any faking it any more. LOL

  2. It's never too late to embrace your inter princess - thanks for following!

  3. Hi, thanks for following me on blogfrog, love to have you aboard.
    Your advice is very interesting, fortunately my friends are all as broke as I am, so I need not worry to be asked out to an expensive restaurant. :)

    Hope your day goes well, love your blog!

  4. Hi again, thanks for the kind words, and thanks for displaying my badge, really am grateful. I have added your link to my blog roll.

    Please let me know when you have a badge and I will gladly add it too.

    Great to see another South African blogger, there are quite a few around lately.

    Enjoy and take care.

  5. Faaaaabulous Dahhhhling!

    "Perception is 2/3 of the law" LOL!
    you rock.

  6. haha great advise! my mums boyfriend just offered me a FAKE Louis V bag - I said Hell NAW! x


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