Prince Charming and I were part of the fortunate few who were not negatively affected by this ugly time in our country's history. So having our regular incomes in a society where everything was on sale, well was like being a housewife at an “All You Can Inject Botox Party”. Everything had to get remodeled, especially my closet!
In 2009 stores by the handful faced the reality of being stuck with excess merchandise and no way to alleviate themselves of their abundant baggage. So the markdowns began!!! Those of us who could shop quickly worked ourselves into a mad frenzy (think Tasmania devil!). I could not believe the bargains I was getting, even embarrassed to pay so little for big designer brands! I reveled in the misfortune of the retail world! Finally I could look like a million bucks without having to spend it!!! My obsession developed quickly and possessed me like the poltergeist of a fashion victim. I wanted to find bargains everywhere, Bloomies, Saks, Niemen’s, JCREW. I ran the gamut, I was is a battle against time to snatch up all the glorious stuff humanly possible before this wondrous time ended.
Well my friends my clock just zeroed out! Unfortunately the merchandise well has run dry! I don’t think I drained it completely by myself, but it is entirely possible! I have come to the end of my rainbow, there is no new fashion left to be bought on sale. And worse yet there seems like there is nothing new coming down the pipelines! Is the faucet in my city empty? I need a plumber ASAP! Where is Tim Gunn when you need that bitch! What am I going to wear? It feels like I have been starring at the same clothes on the rack and in my closet for six months and I refuse to pay full price for anything again!
I need rehab or a time machine so I can reboot my shopping habits back to their original settings; maybe Lindsey will let me share her cell.
“I need more discounted designer slippers or I will scream” – Cinderella
