Friday, October 22, 2010
I managed to squeeze in some me time this afternoon, and since Netflix continues to be down (for what seems like an eternity, gaaw regular TV), I decided to peruse my DVR. Jackpot! Buried deep beneath 100 episodes of "Top Gear" and "How I Met Your Mother" I struck hidden chick flick treasure, "The Lovely Bones". Super excited I hit play and took a sip of my Coke Zero snuggling into the couch. I have not read the book (unbelievable I know), and had no idea what I was plunging myself into. All seemed pretty normal, until the little chick was murdered and then I started to feel weird. Staring at my soda I though someone at Coke must have laced a batch. It was like "Narnia" and "Ransom" had an awful messy drunken hook up and produced this film, which came out with a serious birth defect!
Oh Peter Jackson, I like a spaced out movie MORE than the next girl, and applaud your creativity. The visuals where "totally amazing dude", but jeez, I seriously will NOT have what your are smoking, nightmares and crack cocaine, I presume! I was however, caught off guard by the ending. I was almost positive a hobbit was going to be the one to kill Stanley Tucci. Furthermore, I am very impressed that Mark Walberg has not served you a knuckle sandwich for enticing him to star in this "film". Lucky for you his anger management classes and new found love for the church must be working.
Watching this film was like waking up next to Dane Cook after a rough night of drinking, embarrassing & totally unsatisfying! Thanks Jackson, I will be billing you for 2.5 hours of my time.